These are the ten principles of Win-Win. You can think of them as life tips, game rules, simulation parameters… whatever personally resonates. They are not compulsory, merely recommendations. Nor were they handed down from a booming voice on a mountain, as epic as that would be. They’re mostly distillations of various wisdoms I’ve learned through writings of, or conversations with, very brilliant people. Some are my own insights gleaned from various personal experiences. As such, please take them as seriously or lightly as you feel appropriate.
The universe is fundamentally and radically abundant. Scarcity is the exception, not the rule. As such, a mindset based in scarcity will ultimately self-defeat.
Permanence is a fool’s errand. A living universe is increasingly complex and dynamic. Be adaptive, not boring.
Do your best to grow the pie, not just take from it. In the rare case where the pie cannot grow further, only take your fair share. How you define fair is up to you. (See #4).
Love is that which enables choice1. As such, true power comes from empowering others to make their own choices; to design and play their own games.
All games have consequences. Intelligence is knowing how to win a game; Wisdom is knowing which games to play in the first place.
Selflessness and Sacrifice are not as noble as they appear, for such acts are lose/win. The best acts are mutually beneficial.
A win/win game usually requires some collaboration. That said, such games can — and ideally should — contain competitive win/lose sub-games within them.
Scoring systems can be useful tools, but resist the temptation to turn them into primary goals2. Don’t be a dogmatic maximalist.
While trade-offs can exist, beware of false dichotomies. A paradox often dissolves when viewed from higher dimensions.
Don’t take anything too seriously. The universe loves to play.
These are the ten principles of Win-Win as I best see them. This list is by no means fixed or complete; I just chose this number for obvious memetic reasons. Feel free to suggest any additional principles or propose amendments in the comments below!
I also appreciate some may be clearer in meaning than others, so I’ll elaborate on each in additional posts over the coming weeks.
Til then: GL,HF.
Liv
This is a quote from Forrest Landry’s “Tiny Book of Collected Wisdom”. I recommend it.
This one is derived from Goodhart’s Law , a concept so important and omni-applicable it should be taught in grade school.
Hello Liv, thank you for sharing this. I really enjoy the mindfulness and narrative you're bringing with these principles - and your journey to find more win-win context. These certainly give life to that endeavor. I'll be curious to see how you embody these principles, and how they inform win-win concepts/inventions you propagate.
I'm curious how to integrate these principles into a game, or into a lived collaboration. I feel like this list would help screen culture of existing games for win-win mindsets, and I could see the value of identifying examples of where they are seen and not seen. What kind of things benefit from a scoring system? (aka; not love, but yes to diminished externalities). When in games/life are we most likely going to face an opportunity to "grow the pie" vs shrink it, and how can we be mindful of those moments for ourselves and others?
I feel there may be a hidden root or incentive to win-lose strategy like "ego" or "fear", but I'm uncertain if that's the whole picture. It would be cool to expand this a bit more, and once a satisfying spread of rationale are outlined for why win-lose mindset is gravitated towards; re-screen though the principles and see if there's a sentiment that would help anyone struggling with them transform to the win-win strategy.
I can imagine some skits that emphasize these principles in action becoming trendy, and help to further "show" how they might root in reality. I hope this helps to stir up ideas. I'm excited to see where you'll be able to take this.
Liv, what a super list. I've enjoyed coming across your work this last week, it comes at the same issues I spend alot of time thinking about but from a very different lens. I've read a few of your substacks and caught a few podcasts. The ideas you discuss are very cool in relation to human/human interactions, I am wondering how you see your thought models applying to our more than human interactions? One of my primary lenses is as a regenerative farmer and I'll admit I really struggled with the resource implications of your utopias/distopias episode. I enjoyed the mental gymnastics of the thought games but from my perspective we are playing these games in a very finite box that is being pushed very close to limits. I'd love your thoughts on how we play win-win games with nature. I think regenerative farming is an example, it does not require the massive energy and fossil input of industrial farming, allows farm animals more dignified lives and contributes to the repair of eco systems, while allowing us to reap sustenance in return. I guess secretly I harbour fears about our ability to scale such systems to provide for all of us - perhaps that is just my scarcity training! I'd love your thoughts! xo